Chapter 35 - A Peculiar Dream
The eastern sky displayed a pale white, reminiscent of a fish's belly. The world was enveloped in a light, misty haze, with flowers blossoming by the window, their petals fully spread and their fragrance delighting the senses.
The vast expanse of the sky, with its retreating stars and blooming flowers, adorned the tranquil dawn. One could aptly describe it as a scene of beauty and peace.
Emotions quivered, causing upheavals in this silent world.
Pei Xuan took a long while to regain her scattered senses, her mind seemingly blank or lost in myriad thoughts.
A chill had seeped into half of her body, and her heart felt just as cold. The once vibrant and graceful top gentleman of Xi Jing, who boasted talent and charm, now resembled a delicate flower battered by a sudden spring cold, shaky and tattered.
A sudden jolt, like thunder in a clear sky, made her head spin, leaving her disoriented. She thought, "Am I really seeing a ghost in broad daylight?"
She doubted her sanity.
Perhaps she had been kicked by a donkey in her dream.
Yes, that's right.
She was just dreaming.
She must not have woken up fully.
She got up from her wife's embrace, her eyes dazed, intending to return to her bed and sleep some more.
How could someone born blind suddenly see?
It didn't make any sense.
Why would she think that her wife could see her?
It felt as if she had suddenly malfunctioned.
Her heart thudded rapidly, and her legs felt weak and powerless. While her body was awake, her spirit seemed to be drifting. Without a word, she lay down on the large bed, pulling the quilt over her. The brocade quilt carried the scent of her skin, leading her thoughts back to their passionate embrace the night before.
She remembered that night, with Cui Ti's neck glistening with fragrant sweat that trailed down to her chest. The jade was white, and every inch of her beloved wife's skin was soft.
"..."
Cui Ti watched, amused yet somewhat embarrassed, as Pei Xuan, looking like someone sleepwalking, returned to the bed and closed her eyes. Sitting down beside her, Cui Ti gently poked Pei Xuan's face with her finger, delighting in the sensation.
"Xing Guang."
Pei Xuan lay still with her eyes closed, teeth clenched, looking like a soulless dried fish.
Such a reaction from her was expected. Even if she appeared more dazed, it would be understandable. Cui Ti recalled the shock she had felt upon realizing a deity had granted her sight. It wasn't any less than what Pei Xuan was feeling now.
Earlier, Cui Ti couldn't discern Pei Xuan's feelings and hesitated to reveal the truth. But now, having exchanged marital vows, they were the closest of confidants. It wouldn't be right to keep it a secret any longer.
The kind-hearted Miss Cui spoke in a soft voice, poking the delicate face of the compiler Pei Xuan again, "Xing Guang?"
Her voice was filled with emotion, making it hard for Pei Xuan to deny anything.
She opened her eyes, her lips moved, but no sound came out.
Cui Ti didn't press her, continuing with her story. Her fingertip left Pei Xuan's smooth face and gently caressed the collar of her pristine inner robe, "When I was still with the Cui family, I had a very strange dream. In it, a deity rode a chubby white crane to me, asking what I wished for. At that moment, all I wanted was to see you, to know what you looked like. I had this dream several times, and after that, I could see. But I could only see you."
She admitted it. Although the story of a deity visiting her dreams sounded bizarre, Pei Xuan, trying to ignore the ticklish feeling on her collarbone, pondered quickly and whispered, "Why did you want to see me? Back then, you hadn't met me yet."
"That's true..." Cui Ti blushed, "Before that dream, I actually had a much longer dream."
"Huh?"
Pei Xuan was left dumbfounded.
Her dazed and silly expression was quite amusing. Cui Ti took a moment to etch the image in her mind, planning to tease her about it later. She pursed her lips slightly, "In my dream, I married you."
The knowledge of over a decade was overturned in just a few words. Pei Xuan looked bewildered. After the initial shock, she couldn't help but ask, "Married to me? Was it like how we are now?"
She was intensely curious about this long dream Cui Ti spoke of.
A good story requires both a good listener and a good storyteller. Luckily, they had both at that moment. Cui Ti rubbed her arms, her tone slightly aggrieved, "I'm a bit cold."
Startled by this, Pei Xuan hastily pulled her into her arms, wrapping them both in the quilt.
In a short while, Cui Ti murmured, "Now, I feel a bit hot."
"..."
Pei Xuan kicked off the quilt, holding her close with utmost care, "How about now?"
Finally, Cui Ti seemed content to stay close without thinking of escaping. She began her tale slowly, "In the dream, I was still the eldest daughter of the Xi Ning Lord, blind and looked down upon..."
Without intending to, Cui Ti's words carried Pei Xuan to a place that felt both foreign and familiar.
"You fell from a wall, injuring your hand, and because of that, you only managed to rank third in the imperial examination..."
This fate was both similar yet distinct from their current lives, making Pei Xuan's heart race.
"You married me in a grand procession, and I became the young mistress of the manor. You treated me wonderfully."
"Was it better in the dream or now?" The refined 'Mister Pei' asked cautiously, "Which do you prefer?"
Cui Ti smiled but then became somber, "I didn't like the you in my dream."
"Did she do something that upset you?"
"No."
Pei Xuan was confused, "If she treated you well, why didn't you like her?"
After a moment of silence, Cui Ti spoke softly, "Because she wouldn't consummate our marriage. I couldn't understand her heart, and it left mine insecure."
The impact of the word "consummate" was not insignificant. Pei Xuan belatedly realized what she might have neglected, her back stiffening.
Noticing her reaction, Cui Ti didn't press the issue further, allowing Pei Xuan's imagination to wander. She continued her story, her voice steady and gentle, imbued with a particular charm, "In the dream, I died in the third year after marrying you."
Pei Xuan's anxious heart was completely captivated by her in an instant.
"Someone pushed me into the lotus pond, I died from suffocation in the water."
Cui Ti's voice was calm, but a flicker of panic passed within her. Pei Xuan whispered, "Who harmed you?"
"I don't know."
Unable to extract much information from her, Pei Xuan took a deep breath, "Thankfully, it's just a dream."
But this dream was somewhat chillingly surreal. Only Cui Ti knew that it wasn't a dream, but her previous life when she truly married into the Pei residence. The only difference was that fate granted her another chance to start over.
That's why there were changes. That's why Pei Xuan became the top scholar, and that's why she had the courage to give it her all and fight for herself.
"You are a woman; you deceived me."
Pei Xuan felt as if he had been struck hard, his lips trembling, uncertain of what to say.
"This is the second time you've lied to me."
She even counted that time "in the dream."
No matter how talented or astute Pei Xuan was, the only thing he could do in that moment was to comply with Cui Ti's wishes and release her from his warm embrace.
She was extremely scared.
Like a prisoner on the execution grounds, awaiting the fall of the blade.
The light outside slowly crept in, illuminating the cozy chamber through the patterned windows, making Pei Xuan's figure in Cui Ti's eyes even clearer.
She watched silently as Pei Xuan's face turned pale, saw her floundering helplessly, saw her lost for words. Her heart softened along with him. Her eyes slightly reddened as she recalled the hesitations from her past life, the countless restless nights. She felt he was truly despicable.
Because of her, she never received the affection she so deeply desired and pursued. Even in death, she deluded herself into pretending she had let go.
But she had never truly let go!
Pei Xuan was so kind to her; how could he not love her?
This became her deep-seated issue.
Fortunately, this issue was resolved not too long ago. Pei Xuan chose her, and that gave her the utmost sense of security.
Cui Ti stared intently at him and suddenly bit down hard on his shoulder.
Her teeth bit through the delicate fabric into the soft skin. Pei Xuan gasped in pain but quickly silenced herself, thinking she was the one in the wrong first. If "my wife" bit her, she deserved it.
Someone like her, who concealed her identity and indulged in her desires, had no right to plead for mercy.
Being scolded, mistreated, or coldly ignored was only to be expected.
A faint metallic taste filled the air as Cui Ti released her aching jaw, tears streaming down her eyes: "There won't be a third time."
Pei Xuan held her tightly. The feeling of being forgiven and set free was both abrupt and intense. She laughed out, "My wife!"
A resolute and justified call came from her throat. Cui Ti laughed while crying and eventually retrieved a medicine bottle from the bedside table to apply ointment.
What a roller-coaster start to the day.
The sun shone high, and the soul of Pei Xuan, the compiler at the Hanlin Academy, seemed as if it had been whisked away by some enchantress.
She, the legitimate child of the Prime Minister, had long been recognized and favored by the Emperor. Once her tasks were completed, she could afford to daydream during her leisure time without concern.
Usually, Song Zizhen would tease her when seeing her in such a state. But now, he was too occupied to bother with her. Zheng Wuji was also swamped with work. By contrast, Pei Xuan had too much free time.
Suddenly, an idle Pei Xuan stood up and headed towards the library.
She considered herself well-read, but as my wife mentioned this morning, tales of bizarre dreams and miraculous healings without medicine were unheard of to her.
From this perspective, she hadn't read enough books.
The Hanlin Academy's library contained all sorts of books from around the world. Pei Xuan dived into this ocean of books, seeking out all those that told of supernatural and bizarre events, creating a mountain of books.
She missed her lunchtime, engrossed in reading.
It wasn't until the sun began to set, and the attendant guarding the library urged her to leave, that Pei Xuan reluctantly stopped.
"Xing Guang, what's wrong with you? You seem off!"
Song Zizhen yawned and asserted.
Pei Xuan thought to herself, if you had a wife full of mysteries, you'd be off too. However, women like Cui Ti are one in a million. Song Zizhen doesn't even have a prospective partner, so one can't expect too much from him.
"I'm just mulling over some things; I'll be fine in a few days."
She chose not to elaborate, and both Song Zizhen and Zheng Wuji exchanged glances, deciding not to press her further.
The two men, being single, didn't have the responsibility of returning early to a wife. They chatted for a bit, then went off arm in arm to a tavern for drinks.
All the way home, Pei Xuan pondered over the connection between her dreams and reality, her steps quickening.
If the immortals could open one's spiritual eyes, why couldn't they give her hints through dreams?
Who, in my wife's dream, pushed her into the lotus pond intending to kill her?
She stepped briskly into her house, which was unusually bustling.
Entering the courtyard, she heard laughter from the main hall. Standing at the entrance, she saw Dou Qingyue chatting merrily with her mother. Then she noticed Cui Ti sitting gracefully, smiling softly. A warm feeling spread in her heart.
"Cousin? You're back."
As Pei Xuan stepped in, her eyes met Cui Ti's. An involuntary smile spread on her face: "Mother, my wife, what are you discussing with our cousin?"
Relying on her 'blindness', Cui Ti unabashedly stared at her for a while, making Pei Xuan blush before she looked away.
"It's all about Qingyue being upset that mother hasn't displayed the 'Hundred Sons and a Thousand Grandsons' embroidery she made," remarked Cui Ti.
'Hundred Sons and a Thousand Grandsons'?
Both she and Cui Ti were women. How could they have a hundred sons and a thousand grandsons?
Both her mother and wife were aware of this. That's why they hadn't shown the embroidery. If it had been any other day, Pei Xuan wouldn't have thought much about it. But after knowing about the peculiar incident with Cui Ti, how could she not be suspicious?
Nevertheless, the Pei household was spotless. Even if a jealous maid committed a small mistake, she wouldn't dare harm the young mistress.
Only someone from outside could harm her wife.
Suspicion rose in her heart, making her see potential threats everywhere, and looking at everyone with wary eyes.