Chapter 1 - A Spring Boudoir's Dream
Spring in Xi Jing was beautiful. The willow leaves were tender and the peach blossoms were pink. Under the painter's brush, the mountains and rivers became praiseworthy symbols of a prosperous and peaceful era.
The eyebrow birds had beautiful feathers and perched on the tree branches, lifting their feet. The clouds were white and the sky was crystal clear. The bright and magnificent wonders and grandeur of the world arrived in succession.
In the morning, when the first bell of the city tower rang, everything flowed and lived vigorously, slowly unfolding like a scroll.
The tall city walls and low tiled houses, the common people hustling for their livelihoods and the spirited youths with fine clothes and horses.
Whose family was welcoming a new bride, whose family was playing and singing, the myriad states of the common people were painted into one scene, all different yet similar.
In this bright spring, this wonderful human world, it was a pity Cui Ti could not see any of it.
Cui Ti was blind.
In name she was the daughter of Earl Xining, but in reality she was a marginalized, talked down upon pitiful person.
In a shabby side courtyard, orioles sang in the green willows, chimneys emitted white smoke, Cui Ti sank into a very long dream.
In the dream, she was still the eldest daughter of the Cui family. She was born blind, unloved by her father and mother, looked down upon and ridiculed by others. Even a lowly servant in the household dared to disregard her.
They took advantage of her blindness to set obstacles in her daily path, watching her trip and fall, climb back up, then hid in the shadows to roar with laughter.
She had cried from anger more than once, cried then told herself not to cry, what use was crying?
No one would sympathize.
But later someone did care for her.
The one who cared for her was the heir of the eminent Pei family—Pei Xuan.
At her most destitute and helpless moment Pei Xuan gave her the greatest respect a person could have, welcoming her with an eight-carrier bridal sedan chair, giving her the position of primary wife, and promising to grow old together.
He was willing to cherish her, protect her, help steady her before she fell, patiently pick out the smallest fish bones for her, get angry at servants for disrespecting her, recite poetry of wind, flowers, snow and moon for her, hold her, occasionally kiss her, never scolding or looking down on her.
Everyone else treated her like a broken roof tile, only he treasured her like a beauty jade, respected her like the bright moon.
Cui Ti was satisfied with this marriage, to the point she didn't want to wake from the dream even knowing it wasn't real.
She wanted to repay him, even if it was all fake, just a mirage. She still wanted to repay him.
It was laughable that even in a dream she was still blind.
As a blind person, what she could do was limited. So after ‘marrying’ she let go of her dignity, wholeheartedly wishing to bear children for Pei Xuan to repay his cherishing kindness.
But Pei Xuan was always unwilling to consummate the marriage with her.
Cui Ti worried herself in the dream to the point she lost her appetite and grew thin.
Inside the tiled house, Cui Ti's maid Bai Ge was anxiously rushing around.
The wet towel kept wiping her Miss’ forehead and face, worried that if the fever didn’t break, not only would the Miss be labeled as blind, if her brain was ruined from the fever and she became an idiot, whatever would they do?
She begged and pleaded, murmuring nonstop, hoping the gods in heaven would take pity on her Miss who had such a tragic life, look at how difficult it was for this blind woman to get through the days, look at her kind hearted nature, look at the suffering and grievances she had endured over the years.
Everyone said good people get good returns, her Miss ought to get the best returns!
Why did misfortune never stop plaguing her? Why did troubles keep entangling her?
They were the marquis's own flesh and blood, yet just because she was blind she became an inauspicious creature not fit to see daylight. Bai Ge gritted her teeth as tears welled up in her eyes: "Miss, you must prevail, your servant still awaits the day you turn your fortunes around."
The sun set in the west.
After staying up the whole night and another whole day tending to her Miss, Bai Ge couldn’t endure anymore and collapsed onto the straw mattress falling into a light sleep.
At the slightest sound on the straw mattress Bai Ge alertly woke up and saw Cui Ti lying there with a pale complexion and covered in sweat. She was both shocked and overjoyed: “Miss! You pulled through! Wonderful, wonderful, Miss, woo woo...”
She covered her face and cried aloud: “You finally endured past it, your servant thought, your servant thought...you scared me to death!”
The long dream took some time to recover from, not to mention in Cui Ti’s dream she not only married, but in the end was pushed into a lotus pond to drown.
On the brink of death she realized one thing: Pei Xuan’s cherishing pity for her was not love.
Oh well.
The dream came bizarrely. What was interesting was she not only dreamed someone doted on her, protected her, respected her, pitied her, and married her, she even dreamed an immortal rode a crane and came to open her spiritual eyes.
She desperately wanted to be able to see.
“Miss, how can you still smile? You had such a severe fever yesterday after nearly drowning, those arrogant servants from the north courtyard went over the line this time, we can’t let this go so easily!”
“Servants from the north courtyard?”
“That’s right!”
Seeing her mind still wasn’t very clear, Bai Ge lowered her voice: “The servants from the north courtyard withheld our food rations. I couldn’t stand it and argued with them, but they were unscrupulously bold and actually laid hands on you Miss, causing you to fall in the water. You caught a chill after getting soaked, and not long after returning you started running a high fever...”
Seeing Cui Ti’s odd expression, Bai Ge grew nervous: “Miss, Bai Ge is timid, please don’t frighten me...”
It actually happened just like in the dream?
In the dream she was bullied by the servants from the north courtyard, falling into the courtyard’s carp pond, her whole body drenched as Bai Ge pulled her out. Returning to her quarters she developed a high fever that nearly killed her.
After that Cui Dai came pretending to be concerned and express apologies. But when leaving she slapped Bai Ge. Cui Ti spoke up for Bai Ge but was scolded by Father when he came and punished with two days of hunger.
Is it a dream or not a dream? If it's a dream, why can't she see even after the immortal opened her spiritual eye? If it's not a dream, how to explain the various things that appeared in the dream?
"Miss? Miss??"
"I'm here."
Bai Ge's voice was choked with sobs: "Miss, I will save money to find you a good doctor. Don't give up on yourself. Even if your brain is injured, you will get better eventually."
"What are you thinking about?" Cui Ti reached out tentatively, trying to touch her face, but ended up touching Bai Ge's shoulder instead. She pressed her hand on the side of Bai Ge's shoulder: "Wait a little longer, I need to confirm something."
"What is it?"
"You'll know tomorrow."
In the blink of an eye, tomorrow arrived.
Bai Ge noticed that after the miss fell into the water and woke up, she often stared blankly at one spot, lost in thought. She used to space out frequently, but now the condition seemed to be worse.
Bai Ge was anxious. She counted the copper coins in the bamboo tube three times in the time of one cup of tea - she wanted to find a good doctor for the miss to take a look at her brain. But this meager amount was far from enough.
She felt bad for Cui Ti in secret.
On the surface, Cui Ti was the young miss of the Earl, but everyone in the household knew that the real young miss was not her, but her younger sister - Cui Dai.
Cui Dai, the Earl's youngest daughter from his official wife, was fourteen years old. She had a spoiled and willful personality. She lived in the luxurious northern courtyard. The servants naturally favored the masters, so the servants in the northern courtyard were all shrewd ones.
"She's here."
"Who's here?"
Cui Ti sat up straight: "Help me see, is my third sister here?"
Cui Dai?!
Bai Ge gave a start, and hurriedly looked towards the door.
It wasn't long after breakfast. Upon learning that the blind girl who lived in the shabby hut fell into the water the other day, Cui Dai had 'kindly' led a group of onlookers to gawk.
When they reached the door, she waved her hand in disgust: "What's that smell? How foul!"
The observant servant rushed into the small yard without announcement: "Reporting to third young miss, it's rabbit droppings."
Hearing it was rabbit droppings, Cui Dai bent over, nauseated: "As expected, like mistress like servant. Forget it, I shall reluctantly come in out of kindness since she fell into the pond."
The rabbit droppings were used as fertilizer to grow vegetables. Cui Ti was blind, but her hearing was extremely sharp, and her memory wasn't bad either.
In her dream, Cui Dai had said the exact same words as just now. Later, she still couldn't stand the smell of rabbit droppings, and had her servants kill a litter of rabbits she raised.
Cui Ti thought blankly: So the dream wasn't a dream, but her past life that she had experienced before.
Why did she come back then?
Was it because she died in the lotus pond?
Now that she's dead, would Pei Xuan shed tears for her? Also, would there even be a Pei Xuan in this life?
Trapped in this small yard all year round, unaware of worldly affairs, not knowing if there was an eminent Pei family in Xi Jing, the thought that there was no Pei Xuan, no wonderful man who gave her dreams, made Cui Ti's heart ache sharply.
"What are you thinking about elder sister, your face looks so bad?"
Cui Dai had always looked down on this blind girl. Father didn't like her, mother didn't favor her either. From the time she could remember, there were always people beside her, reminding her to keep away from the blind girl, in case she was tainted by her inauspiciousness.
Before ten years old, she took those words seriously, fearing that she might be contaminated if she got too close. After ten, she discovered the pleasure of tormenting others, and became addicted to it.
At most she could only beat someone to death. Father and mother wouldn't care anyway.
"It's just two bags of rice, why does big sister even bother to calculate with me? See, today I brought you rice to make up for it."
She undid the sack, and casually grabbed a handful of white rice. The rice trickled through her fingers like sand, spilling to the ground.
The young girl made two tsk sounds, innocent yet vicious: "Big sister, look, do you see how you live?" She deliberately exclaimed: "Oh how forgetful of me, big sister is blind and can't see."
"You--"
"Bai Ge, stop!"
She stopped Bai Ge before Cui Dai could scold her servant. Cui Dai flipped her sleeve with a cold humph, unwilling to bicker with a lowly maid any further. But just as she raised her hand, the lowly servant was pulled to the side by someone.
"Third younger sister, I shall not send you off then."
"Who wants you to send me off? A blind girl should look after herself first, lest someday you trip into a pond and die without even knowing how."
She deliberately waited for a while, but didn't get the anger she expected. Even that maid didn't jump at her words. Feeling bored, Cui Dai thought: "Let's go!"
The people from the northern courtyard left slowly, dragging their feet. Bai Ge couldn't help but complain: "Miss! Why did you stop me? The way she talks is too much..."
"It is very excessive."
Cui Ti said weakly: "But what can be done about it?"
In her previous life, Bai Ge was slapped for saying one more word. She was punished with two days of hunger when father found out she defended Bai Ge.
The two days of enduring left her and Bai Ge giddy and weak, raggedly dragging their limp bodies back.
Behind them was undisguised ridicule, many laughing at her for blind eyes and a blind heart, fanciful thinking making her believe she was the Miss.
This time, she didn’t want to repeat the mistakes.
Cui Ti sat on a long bench very old and in disrepair. The bench was very clean but not sturdy, swaying back and forth.
She also knew Bai Ge would soon follow her over dejectedly and complain, then this ‘old friend’ that had accompanied them for many years would collapse under the weight.
“You sit on the square stool.”
Bai Ge’s raised foot paused, surprised the Miss knew she wanted to come over and sit. Obediently sitting across from her, Bai Ge’s shoulders slumped: “Miss, we can’t keep being bullied like this. If we keep being bullied where will we have a place to live?”
“I know, I’m thinking of a way. Don’t make a fuss.”
Bai Ge looked at her. Unable to do anything, she didn’t believe the Miss could come up with any way out.
The morning light was bright and beautiful while time was obscure.
When did she meet Pei Xuan?
It was after the spring rain, when a kite flew over the wall.
Someone fell over the wall, letting out a cry of “Ow” when falling, the voice mellow and rich, sure to decorate many young ladies’ spring boudoir dreams.